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As such, there are some grammatical errors as per the haste in which it was written, however, these do not affect the grading of the work as per NCEA standards.There are also some historical details that require a small amount of correction.After this, there is also a number of links which contain further information as well as that which was used in this essay.
New Zealand played an integral part in many of the legendary battles of World War One, including, Gallipoli, The Somme, and most importantly, the bloody Battle of Passchendaele.
This long, arduous campaign was launched on the 28th of July, 1917 and dragged on until the 10th of November 1917.
In light of that, it is fair to say that this is an essay of a very high standard, despite some shortcomings which are corrected below.
Thus, the following essay is a more than suitable model for students at NCEA Level 2.
If you are writing about Passchendaele, it would be worth mentioning in your introduction that Passchendaele remains New Zealand’s worst military disaster and how this led to the social consequence of affecting a great many families in our nation.
The following essay was written by a Year 12 student by hand in 2016 under exam conditions.The following essay is quite long and essays need not be this long to achieve an Excellence grade, however, the breadth of topics covered in the following essay may inspire you as to conduct your own research into further aspects of the war.Following the essay is a breakdown of the points the student raised and a suggestion of further points that may have been raised as well.These minor changes will be sumarised at the bottom of this page.Typically, the NZQA do not release exemplars of E8 standard, normally, they will only release an E7 exemplar.The Battle of Messines Ridge launched on the 7th of July 1917 , was a successful attack launched on Messines ridge, a German occupied ridge of high ground, which was essential to the Passchendaele campaign.The attack played out extremely successfully, with good conditions and a creeping barrage line which effectively cleared barbed wire allowing easy advancement of Allied troops whilst also holding back any German defenders.This assessment is one of the most widely taken papers in NCEA history.The Battle of Passchendaele can be a well suited event to cover in your essay for this exam at levels 1 & 2.When writing an essay for an internal or external, it is important that candidates return often to the wording of the question in the structuring of their responses and do not wander from the central issue of the paper.In the case of the following AS91234, that issue is to do with causes and consequences, and the impacts of a historical event of significance to New Zealanders, thus students should restrict their analysis to the scope of the event they have studied itself—in this case, the Battle of Passchendaele—and then its causes and consequences.